He claims that he can’t protect me if he falls in love with me.
Crowne Jewel, an all-new bodyguard, enemies-to-lovers, second chance romance from New York Times bestselling author C.D. Reiss is available now!
Protect me at all costs.
Thatโs the mission my father placed on Anton Markovโmy new bodyguard. Shield me from a ruthless, faceless stalker. The menace hijacked my online presence, levied chilling threats my way, and promised to unleash a barrage of damage to me personally and professionally.
Thereโs one problem with Anton.
Itโs simple. I despise him.
He stole everything years agoโmy heart, dreams, and dignity.
With a four-line farewell note stuck to my kitchen table, he broke my heart and almost my spirit.
But it seems Anton has his own collection of grievances over what happened in New York, and heโs not willing to let them go.
Itโs complicated. He hates me.
As my stalker escalates his threats, Anton and I are thrust closer together.
His smoldering good looks, irresistible charm, and unwavering dedication to my safety blur the line between lovers and enemies.
He claims that he can’t protect me if he falls in love with me. With the danger closing in, weโre about to put that theory to the test.
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Iโm sorry.
This is unbearable.
I am weak without you.
I am useless with you.
That was his note. Four lines, like a broken, postmodern five-line poem he didnโt finish because he couldnโt find anything that rhymed with unbearable. I stood at the kitchen table of my SoHo apartment with the paper tilted toward the sunlight, trying to see the impression of what came next.
Was he choosing frailty or futility?
He wasnโt useless. Not to me. He had to know that.
I would have told him as much. Reassured him. Explained that once I didnโt feel cornered, Iโd be able to think about everything with a clear head. But I got sent to voicemail over, and over, and over. That was his answer. He didnโt want reassurance or explanation. He wanted out.
I never forgave him for choosing weakness.
After he left, I came back to Los Angeles with Liangโwho starred in the movie Iโd made after collegeโswearing Iโd start something new.
I never speak of those two years. Itโs as if it never happened, which is how I like it.
โYour brotherโs opening a new club?โ Liang snaps me out of it, holding up his phone to a post from Club Amea.
Weโre at the valet. Anton stands a little aside from us, talking to Colleen.
โYeah,โ I scoff. โDante thinks heโs hot shit.โ
โYeah,โ Jake agrees with a shrug, tucking his fall of hair behind his ear.
I wish we hadnโt run into Anton at that stoplight because frankly, it hurts to look at him.
โIโm sorry I invited him,โ Liang says. โI thought youโd be happy.โ
โI am. Itโs fine. Heโs the reason I leave men alone.โWell, heโs part of the reason. The other reason is that the men have sucked, and Iโm unfortunately not into women.
โI thought it was Neville,โJake says.
He asked me out a bunch of times the first month I knew him, but finally got the hint when I wrote the word NO on a piece of paper and told him to look at it the next time he imagined me saying yes. He apologized and hasnโt brought it up in, like, four monthsโbut some days, it seems as if he wants to give it one more shot. Heโs a good-looking guy. Doableโif you like hapless and socially awkwardโbut itโs still a no.
โNeville was the experiment that proved the hypothesis.โ
โItโs masked cowboy theme!โ Kelly holds her phone up to show us. โPartnership with Ozzie Dots on costumes.โ She looks back down to read the text. โInvitations go out on the 15th. Theyโre saying itโs going to be really hard to get into.โ
โManufactured desire. Dante is such a dork,โ I mutter, waving to Colleen as she gets into her Tesla.
Kellyโs car is right behind. The valet asks Liang if he has the Honda, which means heโs next. The herd is thinning.
Whereโs my freaking car?
Whereโs Antonโs car?
Where are the aliens to tractor beam me up to space?
Thereโs a weight on my shoulder. Antonโs hand. My whole body turns into the camphor he used to rub into the back of my neck. Thick. Gelatinous. Hot and cold at the same time.
โWhat?โ I snap.
โAre you all right?โ
Am I? Why is he asking? Why does he even care? I move away from Jake, pulling Anton to the side.
โWhat the fuck is your deal?โ I demand.
โWhy do I have to have a deal?โ
โYou disappeared three and a half years ago. Now you show up two and a half thousand miles away and want a thousand dollars for half an answer.โ
He dips his head a little, coming close enough for me to get a breath of his cologne, which is nice. Really nice. Thick like bread that melts on your tongue with spice on the roof of the mouth.
Also, hard. Unyielding. Musky. Itโs like burned things.
In New York, he wore something sweeter.
โI answered your questions,โ he says. โYouโre just not hearing me.โ
Iโm still not hearing him. I canโt hear anything over the rush in my head. All the thoughts Iโve avoided push against the wall Iโve built to keep them away. I should just walk away from this conversation, but I canโt move.
โYou owe me an explanation.โ
โYou have all the information you need.โ He says it slowly, as if heโs tasting the words. โThereโs nothing more to say.โ
โYou see, Anton.โ I put my hand on his chest and pinch a crease of wool between two fingers. Speaking as slowly and seductively as he did. โThatโs why you are, and have always been, a fucking bore.โ
โThereโs no one more boring than the bored.โ
โThat explains why you hung around me for how long?โ
โYou were different then. You didnโt do so much talking without saying a single thing.โ
I push away from him and stand back to look at my Insta. I never claimed to be deep. At least, not since New York, and Iโm happier this way. Iโm annoyed that heโs insinuating itโs a bad thing.
No, Iโm annoyed that Iโm thinking about this at all. Itโs like squeezing the bottom of a half-filled balloon. The rubber in the hand gets loose and thick while the taut bubble on top is membrane-thin. Everything was even and cool, but now thereโs an imbalance. The bottom is starved and the top is ready to burst.
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